Therapeutic Fit - An important factor to help you get the most out of therapy
You may at the beginning of your therapy journey or may be questioning if you are with the best provider to meet your specific goals. Your time is valuable and so finding a great fit is understandably a priority of yours. It is certainly normal to feel overwhelmed when you begin the process of starting therapy, but I hope that this information can provide you with some guidance to help point you in the right direction.
“How do I start looking for a therapist?”
For those preferring to utilize their insurance to help cover the cost of mental health services, the first step is to contact your insurance provider and request referrals. If you want to explore local therapists that are in-/out-of-network with your insurance group you can utilize large mental health directories through a simple online search. Regardless of the path you choose to take, I recommend reading the information available online that the potential therapists have written on their profiles/websites. This can give you some information about their specific areas of focus and background. For example, if you are interested in learning strategies to better manage anxiety related to your health, it would be best to look for a provider that mentions having experience treating health-related anxiety with your specific age group (e.g., adult, young adult, adolescents, young children) as opposed to someone who specializes in couple’s counseling. This can be one big step to finding the best fit for you.
“What does therapeutic fit mean?”
Therapists are humans too. We all come with our unique backgrounds, experiences, training, personality, style, values, and expertise. All of these factors (and more!) contribute to the general fit between you and your therapist.
“How will I know if it is a good fit?”
As the age-old saying goes, “you’ll never know until you try!” After you narrowed down a potential therapist based on your unique needs, the next best step is to schedule an appointment. Often, therapists offer a phone consultation so both you and the therapist can get a feel if this seems like a great fit. Of note, sometimes the anxiety of meeting with someone new can get in the way of the connection during the first session. I always recommend meeting with a potential therapist for a few sessions to see if it feels like a great match.
“Will my therapist be upset if I don’t feel like it’s a good fit and I want to switch providers?”
Therapists understand the importance of therapeutic fit and are generally very understanding if you feel that your needs would be better served by another provider. If you are finding yourself in that situation, here are some questions that may help you as you consider changing providers:
§ Is the issue something that could be addressed with your current provider?
For example, you feel like the direction in therapy has gone away from your goals and what you would like to work on. Please mention this to your therapist so the sessions can refocus on what you are hoping to be getting out of therapy. However, any safety concerns should be prioritized in sessions.
§ How long has it been?
Is this just your first session, or has it been a few sessions at this point? The first appointment can give you a glimpse into what it would be like working together with a provider. Typically, the first session can involve the therapist asking you a lot of questions to get to know you and help you determine your specific goals for therapy. After the initial intake session, you should have more time to start directly addressing your goals for therapy and have a better understanding of the therapist’s style and approach if it doesn’t feel clear already.
§ Has the therapist fostered a space for you to be vulnerable during the sessions?
Engaging in therapy can feel emotionally vulnerable and sometimes a fear of judgment can get in the way of feeling ready to open up with a therapist. It makes sense that you may not feel quite ready to discuss certain topics that are significantly vulnerable for you right at the beginning of therapy. If you find yourself in this situation, consider what may feel less vulnerable to share and discuss in therapy until you’re feeling more comfortable diving deeper.
In addition, your therapist should be attending to your needs in the room and helping foster a space where you feel comfortable and heard. If you feel like they are minimizing your experience, making judgements about your concerns, or it is clear they do not align with the same values as you that you deem critical to feel safe disclosing your inner world, then it may be worth transitioning to a new provider.
§ Have you practiced the strategies taught/discussed in session to see if it makes an impact on your life?
Given that you may only see your therapist a few times a month, your therapist likely has encouraged you to practice specific skills outside of the therapy session to help meet your goals. Discuss any challenges with fitting these exercises into your daily life to help problem solve and see if that makes a positive impact on your perceived fit or usefulness of the therapy.
Starting therapy can be one of the best decisions you make for yourself. Often, it can be a time of great reflection and personal growth. Consider the points above when meeting with a potential therapist to help you choose who you want to help you on this journey.
